Representin from the Upper West / Money making puttin me to the test

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

You Might be a Gunner

  • If, out of the 150 students in your lecture hall, you're the only one on a first name basis with the professor - you might be a gunner.
  • If the amount of time you spend speaking in class is second only to the amount of time the professor spends speaking - you might be a gunner.
  • If you include yourself in EVERY conversation the professor has with EVERY student at the end of class - you might be a gunner.
  • If you literally run up to the professor at the end of class - you might be a gunner.
  • If you haven't missed an office hour yet - you might be a gunner.
  • If you were first on line to pick up the writing competition...and you camped out for it like it was tickets to star wars - you might be a gunner.
  • If you spend more time preparing for moot court than most appellate lawyers would spend on their supreme court arguments - you might be a gunner.
  • If you bring up your work or life experience in class ("Well, when I worked at the State Department....") - you might be a gunner.
  • If you wear a suit and tie to class and you didn't just come from an interview - you might be a gunner.
  • If you keep a blog detailing your exciting scholastic career - you might be a gunner.
  • If you didn't go home for Thanksgiving or on vacation for spring break so you could spend more quality time in the library - you might be a gunner.
  • ....even though your Grandma was on her death bed - you might be a gunner.
  • If you wrote a book about your 1 L experience and made yourself sound like a freakish, neurotic tool - you might be a gunner.
  • If you sign your emails with a legal quote (from Holmes, Cardozo, etc.) and update it daily - you might be a gunner.
  • If you use a rolling backpack, and you're a healthy guy - you might be a gunner.
  • If you bring a textbook stand to class - you might be a gunner.
  • If you threw your wireless ethernet card out the window so you would have no distractions in class (not a bad idea) - you might be a gunner.
  • If you joined two different study groups just to make sure you weren't missing anything - you might be a gunner.
  • If you feel nauseous when people ask you to give them your notes when they missed class - you might be a gunner.
  • If you're an older student that patronizingly addresses your fellow classmates as 'sonny' or 'little lady' and lets them know that they're lacking in the real world experience you posses - you might be a gunner.
  • If you make sure to correct every little mistake your fellow students or professor may occasionally make - you might be a gunner.
  • If your comments in class often being "Well, this doesn't answer your question, but" or "I know this is off-topic but I just wanted to mention...." - you might be a gunner.
  • If your professor has ever stated he will not call on you for the rest of the day - you might be a gunner.
  • If you sit in the same seat in every class, especially if it's front row center - you might be a gunner.
  • If when you talk, you use the biggest words you can think of, and talk slowly so it seems like you're continually thinking really hard, and you make sure to reapply concepts previously taught by the professor - you might be a gunner.
  • If you actually read the 'suggested' reading, and reference the professor's published articles in class - you might be a gunner.
  • If you go to Chicago - you might be a gunner.
  • If you remind your classmates of that guy in Office Space who nods his head as Lumbergh talks about the consultants coming (trying to show Lumbergh that he's listening really closely) - you might be a gunner.
  • If you remind your classmates of Reese Witherspoon's character in Election - you might be a gunner.
  • If you refer to fellow students as "my colleagues" - you might be a gunner.
  • If you laugh loudly at every single lame law joke made by your professor - you might be a gunner.
  • If you have sex dreams about your professors - you might be a gunner.
  • If you attend your school's talent show, and at least one of the sketches includes an obnoxious character that appears to be modeled on your mannerisms and mode of dress - you might be a gunner.
  • If you find this list, printed and highlighted, on your seat in class one day - you might be a gunner.
  • If you find that you're the center square in your classmate's version of gunner bingo, well, then you probably are a gunner.
New Feature: You Might be a BUSH FAN!